im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
