He disabled his match.com account in front of me
hell yes lets make some ravioli
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Randomize
