We won't sleep together?
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
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