Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize