remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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