me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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