Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
I am spending my child support on dildos
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
