I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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