Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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