she woke up with a sticky ear
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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