I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
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He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
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I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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