He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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