does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
