My hand turned me down
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
