Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize