he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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