It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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