sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
