And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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