you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
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Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
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So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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