No, drunk sperm still make babies.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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