what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.