i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I'm always down for nudity.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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