Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Randomize
