I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
His nipple licking is glorious
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