that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
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Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
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Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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