Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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