me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Holy sore nipples Batman
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
