I am spending my child support on dildos
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
