At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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