There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
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Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
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Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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