just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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