I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
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Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
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I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
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