did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Randomize
