I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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