I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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