Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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