Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another day, another engagement, another cat
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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