Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
