how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
