My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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