chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
