I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
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