I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize
