I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
