lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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