Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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