let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
