we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
