What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
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