ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize