I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
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