I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
