I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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